Monday, January 30, 2012

That Girl / This Girl

There's this gal whose blog I follow She's just the cutest thing, and her blog inspires me so! One day she posted this:
That Girl: I can’t do this. I’ve already failed a million times.
This Girl: Even if it takes a million times, I will do this.
That Girl: I’m too far gone to ever be different.
This Girl: It’s never too late to be what you might have been.
That Girl: It will take forever to lose the weight. Ugh.
This Girl: Healthiness is something I want for a lifetime.
That Girl: Everyone will be skeptical if I try again.
This Girl: Believe what you will – trying again is the only way.
That Girl: I like good food too much to give it up.
This Girl: No food is worth dying over.
That Girl: There are too many temptations to be successful.
This Girl: Addressing temptation head-on leads to success.
That Girl: I know I will mess up, so why even try?
This Girl: I know I will mess up, so why NOT try?
That Girl: My body is fine just the way it is. Take it or leave it.
This Girl: God’s not finished with me yet. Be patient with me.
That Girl: I don’t have time to focus on my health.
This Girl: I make time for what is important.
That Girl: I am not an athlete. Exercise is not for me.
This Girl: I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.
That Girl: I will wait until tomorrow.
This Girl: “Tomorrow” is not a day of the week.
That Girl: If I lose the weight I need to, I will be happy.
This Girl: My weight does not determine my happiness.
That Girl: This just seems impossible.
This Girl: What seems impossible with man is possible with God.
That Girl: No one understands how this feels.
This Girl: I am not alone.
I want to add a new entry. This is totally from the heart, and based on my past two weekends:
That Girl: Oh, well. I've blown it again. Might as well give up.
This Girl: Oh, well. I blew it yesterday (or the weekend.) Today is a NEW DAY, and I am BACK ON PROGRAM!!
The reason that I'm such a seasoned WW veteran is that I would "blow it", and then not being able to recuperate and get back on track. And that would be the end of the journey for me. Thankfully, this time, something seems to have clicked in my brain that helps me to really get that, while not blowing it is certainly better than blowing it, starting over is always the better choice. I remember hearing one former WW leader say "Start where you are right now." Okay, so the weekend wasn't perfect. That's okay. I counted my points, and I still have some Weekly Points left, so I didn't really blow it as bad as I could have. The weekend wasn't perfect, but every day starts off perfect (OP) and perfection depends on my decision. This is where I am today, at this moment... perfect (OP).. and I will build on that. There are so many things in life over which I have no control. But the one thing I can control is what I put in my mouth. There's a weekend tacked to every week, and I know those are my challenge days, when I'm off the normal routine. It's still early in the journey, and with each weekend challenge lies a new opportunity to do better. I may never reach weekend OP perfection, but as long as I'm able to refocus and get back on track once the weekend is over, I am not going to consider it defeat. If I make better choices five days out of seven, then I will take it!! The weight may take a little longer to come off, but this eating plan is for life. I have found that if I'm not going down, I'm going up. I'm not That Girl any more. This Girl is going down.
Happy Monday, everybody!!!

Thursday, January 26, 2012


Yes, friends, it's that time again.  When every entrance to every store will be descended upon by our little green-vested munchkins, wielding the weapon that brings many of us to our knees.  Girl Scout Cookies.  I will be the first to admit the demise of many a diet plan with "just one" cookie.  Just one cookie turns into two or three.  And then, since there are only a dozen or so in the box, in order to hide the evidence of my binge, I'll just eat the entire box so I can destroy the evidence.  I can't quote the date, but I distinctly remember the first time I bit into a Tagalong.  Oh. My. Goodness.  Can I just say that I died and went to heaven right then and there!  On the spot. In the ensuing years, I have personally, all by my own self, consumed enough Tagalong cookies to build the Superdome.  Well, maybe not quite that many, but... there's still time... right?

My very own little granddaughter will will be among the green-vested clad of munchkins outside Wal Mart this year.  They really know how to play it, don't they! Number One: Who can resist the opportunity to support such an an outstanding organization as the Girl Scouts?  (We will, for the purpose of this post, ignore the deplorable fact that the troops only realize 10-15% of each sale)  Number Two:  Who can resist the sweet little faces of the little girls who rush to meet you with such enthusiasm?  (and the weary faces of their adult supervisors who just want to go home and get in out of the cold) Number Three:  And the bottom line is... who can resist the delicious cookies themselves?

I can resist them.  (repeated to myself ad nauseam).  I can resist.  I will resist.  
All together now, say it with me:  We Will Resist!

The beautiful thing about WW is that we actually don't have to resist. Budget the cookie(s) into your daily points allowance, and it's fine.  The ugly thing about my own personal self is that... it's kind of like being an addict... I do not have strength enough to stop after just one or two.  I know this.  Therefore I have made a promise to myself, and have told several of my friends about it.  I'm going to choose something that I would never otherwise buy or do for myself.  When the cookie season is over (and don't even talk to me about freezing them... there are never any left to freeze...), and all the cookies have been sold, delivered, and consumed, on the day that I can declare (shout!) that I didn't eat one cookie, no, not even ONE... then I shall treat myself to whatever-something I decide on.  It has to be a really good something, otherwise I'll just buy/do it anyway, regardless of the cookie thing.  So, while I'm ordering cookies for my DH, and helping my granddaughter meet her sales goals, I'll be thinking of what it is that I want my reward to be.  Incidentally, if I had all the money I've spent on GS cookies over the past 30-40 years, I could probably afford a nice cruise or a weekend trip to Vegas or NYC.  But I won't have that much money, so I gotta think of something special on a smaller scale.  

What's something you would use as a reward for achieving a giant goal like this?

Monday, January 23, 2012

Monday, Monday

It has been a yucky, rainy, chilly weekend, and today is no different. The rain has been so bad my phone service went out, and my turtle-speed internet has slowed to a snail's pace. Other than that, it's a beautiful day in the neighborhood! Feeling back in control today after the weekend almost went out of control. Whew! That was close! 

My tummy is feeling better today, thankfully! I added 5 more minutes to the treadmill, and upped the speed from 2.0 to 2.5 mph. Baby steps. Lots and lots of baby steps. 

My BFF Debbie Jo is tentatively planning on attending my meeting Thursday night, and most likely will be joining the next week. We're both old pros at WW, and she lost over 100 lbs on the program several years ago. I finished my Jennifer Hudson book this weekend, and took it to her this morning. She's getting the same vibe as me... seems like the WW ads are everywhere, and even Dr. Oz is getting on the bandwagon (though I'm still not sure exactly in what capacity). I'm just glad she's feeling the tug like I was, and hope that she'll soon be on the journey with me. She was a model WWer, so faithful to research, count points, and journal her food intake. I think she's gonna really love the e-tools, and rock the program! It will be so much fun to be traveling the journey together (again!)

So despite the dismal weather outside, Monday, Monday has been a good day so far. Quittin' time isn't until 11 p.m. tonight, so I still have quite a ways to go before I can call the work day complete. I have the DVR programmed to record that stupid Bachelor show, and like I've done every other Monday since the new season started, I'll finish up my work and go chill out in front of the TV for a while before going to bed. Every season I say I'm not going to watch it. And then I get sucked in every time. ha! Doesn't take much to entertain me, I guess. 

Happy Monday, Monday, everyone!

Sunday, January 22, 2012

Weekend, Be Gone!!

Okay, enough already.  It has been a rainy, dreary, messy weekend with a house full of grandkids.  When it rains, my internet service sucks even worse than it already does.  And that makes for a very grumpy CathyB. My work depends on my internet connection.  And when it's slow, I cannot be productive.  Thus the grumpy CathyB. 

This little girl looks sad that the weekend is over.  I'm pretty much glad it's over... and hoping that the End Of Story, in my case for this weekend, is a GOOD thing!!

I fell off the wagon this weekend.... but I'm keeping it all in perspective.  I still have 30 points left in the weekly allowance, so I'm not in the negative or anything, but it's still very early in my week.  Weigh in is Thursday.  I'm thinking that 0.8 gain has done something to my brain. I know the reason for the gain, and am determined not to let it get me down. But I think way underneath the layers of my resolve, there lies a little niggling monster that is screaming "see there, I told you it wouldn't work... again!!"  I'm taking control, and getting back on track.  My NSV here is that I tracked my mistakes.  The Old Me would have just figured nobody will know, and nobody will care, so just scratch off the day and go to the next.  The New Me is trying to live up to the promise to myself to track everything.  The good, the bad, and the ugly.  Nobody else will know.  And truth be told, nobody else probably would care.  But I know.  And I care.  This is not about anyone else.  It's about me.  And if I can't be true to myself, and own my mistakes and bad choices, then I'm the one who will be hurt by it.  Nobody else.  It's not a narcissistic thing.  

And so I have tracked my mistakes, and will move forward.  My work week started an hour ago, and I'm back into my routine.  I have 8 points left for today, without dipping into my extra allowance.  That is manageable.  And I'm reaching back to something I read last week that said "If you kinda do it, it kinda works.  If you really do it, it really works".  So for the rest of today, I will really do it.  I won't think about tomorrow or the rest of the week.  I'll just concentrate on the next hour, then the next, and soon my work day will be over, and it will be time for sleep.  And tomorrow I'll have a brand new day to work with... even if I have to take it one hour at a time.  

Happy Sunday, everyone!

Friday, January 20, 2012


As per my TMI post yesterday, my IBS tummy problems did not bode well for me last night on the scale. I was up 0.8. I had psyched myself up for it all day (several days), knowing what would happen. But, I was secretly hoping for a little mini-miracle, and was pretty bummed when I didn't get my miracle. 
So what's the NSV? The NSV is that The Old Me would have totally blown it and used the bump in the road as an excuse to eat ice cream and cookies and candy... after all, I showed a gain, and I have SEVEN DAYS to get back on track and lose that 0.8 lb... right? 

My DH attended the meeting with me. He seriously needs to be on the plan. Unfortunately, he wasn't very motivated with the speaker or the ladies, so I doubt he'll be officially joining the program. I keep hoping he will see my success, and simply adopt better eating habits and make better choices. He has been impressed so far with my resolve to do this. The main reason he went with me, though, was the promise of dinner out afterwards. One of our favorite places to go is Chili's. I knew I had only had 8 points all day long, and I knew I could fit the meal into my plan for the day. Even though I was discouraged, I am amazed that I wasn't even tempted to chunk the plan and order what The Old Me would have ordered. I got the Margarita Chicken. My handy-dandy iPhone WW app told me this was 15 points. I exchanged the beans and rice for steamed broccoli, and though I'm not sure it was 100% correct, I shaved off 2 points and only counted it as 13 points. And besides, I gave about 1/3 of the chicken to DH. For my other side, I ordered a house salad, lite dressing on the side. I didn't eat the croutons. I counted 3 points for the salad dressing, but I need to investigate that a little more, and may need to adjust the value. 

Edited to add- I looked up the values for the lite dressing and figured the points. Only 2, instead of 3. Yay!

I picked up some medication for the IBS, and hopefully that will settle down soon. I know that even though it's a setback, it could have been a lot worse. And I know that I worked the program correctly. I'm even thinking that it's taking my body a little while to get accustomed to the new eating habits, (especially the lack of all the fatty food I used to eat), and it's just adjusting to the new regimen. All will be well, and I'm okay. 

I found the safety key for the treadmill, and that's on my (very long) list of things to do today! 

Happy Friday, everyone!

Thursday, January 19, 2012

Thursday Morning Comin' Down

Thursday, January 19, 2012
Post ImageYay! It's the last day of the work week!! Well, for my "main" job, at least. I'll have some contract work to do tomorrow, but that shouldn't take long. Tonight is weigh-in #3, and I'm trying to psyche myself about it. I have IBS, which means that some days I *go* and some days (sometimes many days in a row), I *don't*. (Sorry, TMI) But it is a significant issue, and I know it can wreak havoc on the scales. I am trying to be prepared for that. Because I know I've been perfectly OP points-wise. My plan to get the treadmill moved to a user-friendly location was delayed, but I'm happy to report that this morning we moved it to the new location. I have ordered a personal DVD player, so that I can pass the time on the treadmill watching movies. I scored all the Twilight movies for $2.00 each on Black Friday, so I'm excited that I will have time to watch them. It's a kill-two-birds-with-one-stone kind of thing. Get my walking in, and watch some movies that DH doesn't care about seeing. Yay!

Tuesday, January 17, 2012

Treadmill Desk

I so want this. My problem is that I use a footpedal to control the digital voice files that I'm transcribing. I'm hoping someone can invent a thumb-activated control. I would totally use this. I already have a treadmill, so I'm brainstorming how my DH, who can build anything, can build this desk for me... with the option to sit down too. Some of these treadmill desks come with "lifts" that will lower and raise the desktop to allow for either sitting or standing. Yep, I want one of these.

Sunday, January 15, 2012

Don't Blink!

I swear... I only blinked once or twice, and the weekend is gone!!  My work week actually began today, so I'm one-down, four-to-go.  But from Thursday evenings til around noon on Sundays, time moves at warp speed.  It was a good OP weekend, and (thanks to the weekly points allowance), I didn't go over on my points.  To celebrate my loss, DH decided to take me to dinner on Friday night.  Red Lobster.  Yum.  Based on my normal behavior there, it's not exactly WW friendly, but I ended up doing okay.  I could have chosen the broiled flounder, but ended up going with the popcorn shrimp.  According to Dottie (DWLZ), the popcorn shrimp is 15 points.  (This is supposedly with the P+ formula).  I carefully divided the shrimp into three equal portions, kept one portion for myself, and scraped the other two portions onto DHs plate.  My baked potato was so small I almost needed a microscope for it.  I truly don't think it merited 4 points, but wanting to err on the side of caution, I counted 4 points for it.  Dottie also says that the cheesy garlic biscuits are 3 points, so that's what I tracked.  I informed DH that if we were going to such a place, then I would risk embarrassing us both by taking my little tote bag... that held my 0 points spray "butter", my 0 points sour cream, and my 1 point salad dressing.  So, I had a deliciously "sinful" dinner out for 13 points.  Yay!  I was extremely satisfied, and quite adequately full.  Strangely, I was satisfied about halfway into the meal, and told DH that I truly could stop there... and I suppose I should have... but I'm still claiming the victory for taking my own condiments and only eating ONE biscuit and only 1/3 of the shrimp.  Normally I would eat two or three of the biscuits and clean my plate and salad bowl.  
After dinner, my DH experienced the demon-possessed state of my car that I had experienced earlier in the day.  You know how you tell them something, and they're like "yeah, okay, umm hmmm".  Well, when the electric locks screwed up on HIM, and HE had to stand out in the freezing cold... THEN he believes me and decides it's a huge thing.  Needless to say, he promised to fix it.  Then his work obligations got in the way on Saturday, then his daughter called wanting him to visit today... so my locks still aren't fixed.  I've been pouting about it all weekend.  (Surely that's worth some activity points, doncha think???)  Thankfully, the doors have stayed in the "unlocked" position and I was able to drive over and pick up my grandbabies, then go to church this morning and take them home.  Just didn't dare lock the car.  And who knows when they will decide just to randomly lock all by themselves. Maybe I'll get locked out somewhere and he will have to drive 40 or 50 miles from a job site to come pick me up.  I just hope there's a warm place to wait. HA! I'd better be careful what I wish for.  
At least the time with the grandbabies was sweet.  They're so precious!!!!  Before DH and I got married last April, my daughter and her family lived in the same house with me.  I have sure missed the little munchkins since I moved in with DH.  Not seeing those sweet little faces every day, and feeling those little arms around my neck has sure been tough.  But I got my refill this weekend, with lots of love, hugs and kisses to tide me over til next time. 
Today's lunch was a Zaxby's salad, complete with THEIR salad dressing AND the piece of bread that comes with it.  (Told you I was pouting) Godawful total points.  But then I had some veggie soup for dinner, so I still came out okay.  Even though I'm still in good shape points-wise, I don't think it's wise for me to eat like that all the time.  So I guess it's a good thing my work week has started.  Didn't get the treadmill moved yet, but plan on doing that tomorrow.  So it's back to structured eating and working the treadmill. 
Now let's see if I can blink away the work week...

Thursday, January 12, 2012

Step Right Up!!

It's those words we hear every week.  "Okay, hun, I'm ready.  Step right up on the scale."  We take off our jacket, slip out of our shoes, and we step up. And we hold our breath... waiting for the verdict.  We might close our eyes, or plug our ears because we don't want to hear the words. Or we might watch her face intently, waiting to see if we can tell by her expression- gain? loss?  Sometimes when we think we've had a terrific week, we don't do so well on the scale.  Sometimes when we don't think we've done so well, we show a loss.  It doesn't take us long to learn that often the number on the scale is a poor judge of our level of success.  Just like last week, I wasn't sure what the scales would show, but in my mind, I was happy with how the week went.  And I knew that was the important thing.  I stayed on program.  Seven days.  The entire week.

So tonight I stepped right up.  And before I could search her face intently, I heard a little exclamation. "Ohhh!"  And she was smiling.  It was a good thing.  4 pounds.  Down!  BOOYAH!!!  

I know what this means.  This means it's time to get busy and start moving.  Time for my body to shift into famine mode and start holding on to the calories and stop this insane weight loss.  

So tomorrow I'm having the hubby move the treadmill to a user-friendly location, and I'm lacing up the sneakers.  

I got my 5-lb star tonight, and the leader asked to what I attributed my success.  My response was this:  "Because I want this."  And that's pretty much the bottom line.  When I don't want to lace up the sneakers and walk on the treadmill, that will be my mantra.  "Because I want this."

Hope everyone has a great weekend!! 

Wednesday, January 11, 2012

Eating To Live

It's still early in my WW journey.  It's still the honeymoon phase.  With such a large amount of weight to lose, I realize the road ahead will be long, and the numbers won't go down as fast as I hope.  I've done this plenty enough times to know that plateaus and gains are inevitable along the journey.  With every prior attempt at weight loss, something has come along and messed me up.  There has been a jumping-off point each and every time.  Maybe it was a gain, a plateau, a Lap-Band disaster (LBD), etc.  It never failed, though, something always made me stumble and ultimately fall.

Or did it? In retrospect, with the exception of the LBD, which constituted a medical emergency over which I truly had no control, who or what was to blame for my failures?  Was it the scale at the WW meeting that showed a plateau or a gain?  Was it the drug rep who brought Olive Garden for lunch when I worked at the office?  Was it the Dairy Queen for inventing Blizzard ice cream treats?

How easy it is to blame someONE or someTHING else.  It's time to get real about my past failures, and own responsibility for them.  I'm in my 10th day of being totally OP with WW, and I've done a lot of self-examination.  Years of being overweight have allowed plenty of time to fashion clever excuses and rationales for what I eat, and why I eat it.  Each time I would start a new plan, whether it be WW or something else, I would go into it with the mindset that I would lose the weight I wanted to lose... and I hope I lose it fast, so that I can stop denying myself (insert favorite food here) and get back to eating what I really want.

In a warped kind of way, I think I'm glad I never made goal.  For with that kind of thinking, all the weight would be gained back within a few months, and then all the hard work of losing it would have been for naught.  I am finally at the place where I understand that 1) I don't have to deny myself (insert favorite food here)... as long as I'm willing to spend my points on it, I can have whatever I want.  Maybe not as much or as often before, but nothing is totally off limits.  Hopefully I'll stay away from danger foods, but the realization that I can work anything into the plan makes it doable forever.  2) It's not a diet. As Richard Simmons (I believe it was) used to say... the first three letters of diet are DIE.  We don't want to DIEt, we want to LIVEit.  I have to have a plan that I can live with.  Forever. Without liposuction, my fat cells aren't going anywhere.  They will just sit there... just waiting to blow up again.  So reaching my goal is only half the battle. I've seen many people reach their ideal weight, then return to their previous way of eating.  The fat cells in their body go into party mode and start filling up again.  And even worse, those little suckers are saying 'Oh no, you will NOT starve us again', and they will engorge themselves even more, resulting in gaining back more weight than originally lost.  Realizing that getting to goal, though it totally ROCKS, doesn't mean the journey is over is tantamount to success.  I'm 53 years old.  Hopefully I have quite a few more years left on this earth... and every day I will need to be conscious of my food choices, get my body moving, and maintain a healthy weight and fitness level.  I sure wish I had embraced this 20 or 30 years ago, so that by this age, I'd  be really good at it.  :-)

As I've said before, weight loss is 99% mental for me.  And that part of it is going really well, at this moment. It's supernatural.  It's God helping me, and giving me strength.  My biggest problem is that I have to rid myself of the cloud of prior "failures" hanging over my head.  Sometimes I hesitate to say "I Will Do This" because I remember all the times before when I said it, and then I didn't do it.

But this time has to be different.  I have to be stronger than the memories.  Because it sure feels great to be Eating To Live, rather than Living To Eat.

Monday, January 9, 2012

The Weekend That Was

[I've made a decision.  It is impossible for me to try to manage three blogs.  I have a personal one  that has fallen to neglect, and I have one on the WW site.  It's just too difficult and confusing trying to maintain them all.  Not that I think I have such a huge audience or anything... lol.  I've decided to do double-duty with the X-(Banded) Files and the WW blog.  I'm going to use the same post for both blogs. Below is my post this morning from the WW site, which recaps the weekend... some of which I already posted about on X-Files.  Combining the blogs will alleviate my trying to remember what I posted where. LOL. So, there you have it.  My attempt at simplifying.  I will occasionally post on my personal blog about my weight-loss journey, but I prefer to keep this one a little more private.]

Yay. I survived my first OP weekend!! Fact is, I didn't eat enough! How insane is that! I was a little worried on Saturday, at home most of the day alone, without a structured work day. I got the nibbles pretty bad, but fortunately had some mushrooms in the fridge and a yummy dip that my WW leader recommended. (In case you're interested, it's 2 cups of plan, non-fat Greek yogurt [in and of itself can i just say ICK!], mixed with a packet of Hidden Valley Spicy Ranch dressing mix. Serious yum factor for veggies, 0 points!) Thankfully that tided me over until dinner, when my sweet hubby baked some chicken and made big salads for us. 

Sunday is a work day for me, and hubby was working away from home as well, so I got my structure on again, and sailed through the day. 

This is too easy. I'm trying to prepare myself for smaller losses as time goes by, and that I will, like I always have done in the past, get tired of the program and go back to my gluttony ways. If I can just make myself remember that these days of being perfectly OP that I'm satisfied and full. But then again, being full has never been my problem anyhow. I eat stuff because it tastes good. It feels good in my mouth, I love chewing it up and swallowing food. It really has nothing to do with hunger. 

Will this feeling of empowerment last? I sure hope so. I also know that for me weight loss is 99% mental. Right now I'm where I need to be mentally, and that is 100% of the reason why it's so easy.

I may have a problem with the husband. He was blown away that I lost 3.4 lb on my first weigh-in. He says he wants to do it with me. But he continues to make cookies, eat chocolate, etc. I noticed that he had eaten one of my frozen entree dinners the other day. Last night I told him that if he wants to do the program with me, and count points, then he is welcome to any of *my* food that he wants. But, I don't appreciate him eating *my* food, and in the next minute baking cookies and eating whatever the **** he wants to eat. Is that selfish of me? He is absolutely the best thing ever, and for the most part he is supporting me 100% (I think he just can't get past the good manners of offering to share his goodies with me... lol). He asked me the other night if I felt like he was on board with me and supporting me, that it was very important to him for me to know that. But then, it's all up to me to exercise the willpower to say no when he offers me something that I don't include on my eating plan. He has to eat lunch out every day, and I told him that if he would just make better choices at breakfast and dinner, and then be conscious of what he has at lunch (skipping the hot cheese dip for plain salsa, etc.) that it would be a really good place to start. I am hopeful that he will do this. He needs to lose about 80-90 lbs too. He is a diabetic, has hypertension and hypercholesterolemia. His dad died of a heart attack and his brother had a sudden-death MI at age 45. I only got reacquainted with him a little over a year ago (we grew up in the same hometown and secretly had crushes on each other), and we were married in April of 2011. We have seven grandchildren between us, and so much more to live for!! I pray every day for strength to continue on with the program, and hope that he will want to join me, or work whatever plan he feels best with, doesn't have to be WW, so that we can get in better shape, live longer, healthier lives, and enjoy each other for many years in the future. 

Wow. I sure didn't intend to get off on THAT!! LOL. 

How about ya'll. What are some things you do to encourage your spouse to make healthier choices? In my case, I hope "actions speak louder than words" and he will see the difference it makes in me. Even just a week into it, I already "feel" like a new person in my head. :-) Maybe that will be enough to motivate him too. 

Happy Monday!!!!

Saturday, January 7, 2012

Saved By A Fungus

Had an indulgent (extremely rare) Saturday morning, and slept in til around 9.  My weekend starts on Friday, as I work Sunday through Thursday, so tomorrow it's back to work.  Bleh.  I don't start until 1 p.m., which allows me to go to church, but also means I work til 9 p.m.  Bleh.  Mondays I work 11 a to 11 p, and this week I'll be subbing for a 2nd shift co-worker on Tuesday, and will be working 2 p to 11 p.  Bleh.  But... I'm so very thankful for a job I enjoy, and the flexibility that working from home affords.  All that to say... my weekend is officially over, and I'm wondering where it went.  For the past couple of months, every Friday and Saturday have been filled with appointments, preparing for the holidays, visiting family, etc.  My husband had to work today, so I had the entire house to myself with no plans.  I don't know which I enjoyed more... the anticipation of a day with no plans or commitments, or the day itself.  There were a few items on my I-might-do-today-if-the-notion-strikes-me list, and I was able to check off the ones that appealed to me the most.

The only bad thing about a non-structured day is that I notice myself wanting to snack.  And let me tell you the most horrible thing that happened.  I was in my office, looking for something in my desk, and I came across this:

Oh. My. Stars.  My salivary glands burst forward with a rush of drool.  I reached for my phone and scanned the bar-code.  7 points.  SEVEN.  This is what I get for hiding the candy bar in the first place.  Oh yes, I hid it.  Several months ago, when I was pretending to the rest of the world to be trying to make better choices, I bought 2 of them while in the check-out line at Wal Mart.  They were on sale.  Just doing my part to stimulate the economy.  So I ate one on the way home, and hid the other one safely away in my desk drawer, with the intention of enjoying it at a later time.  I guess I forgot about it.  Dang.  After scanning the bar-code, I fondled the package for a few more seconds, then straightaway transported the handful of temptation to the cabinet where my husband keeps his snacks that I'm no longer eating. (Imagine his surprise to find it tonight, and oh how I basked in his praise about how strong I was, and what willpower I exhibited by not eating it.  You dang right, I wallowed in every bit of the praise and even praised my ownself... something I very rarely ever do.  Being how I'm so humble, and all... you know.)  Anyway... it was a huge victory for me.  I won't even tell you how much I love those things. 

I knew I was in trouble, though, and I could feel my cravings trying to claw their way to the forefront, so I knew I had to find something to snack on that would also fill me up, because I wasn't only craving something, I really was hungry.  I found the perfect snack.

At our meeting last week, our lecturer shared a veggie dip recipe that she promised was really yummy.  I had picked up the ingredients, and thankfully, had already whipped it up.  Very simple.  2 cups of plain, non-fat Greek yogurt mixed with one envelope of Ranch Spicy Dressing mix.  

Earlier in the week I had scored BOGO fresh mushrooms at the grocery store.  So..... for my snack this afternoon, I had about 3/4 cup of mushrooms, and maybe 3 Tb of the dip.  0 points. Very satisfying and filling. Yay!!  Saved by a fungus!! Disaster avoided!!  Later, my sweet hubby baked some chicken breasts, and I made giant green salads.  Yummmeee.  I had enough points left over for my WW ice cream while I watched the Republican debate on television.  

It was a great Saturday!  I hope yours was too!!  

Friday, January 6, 2012

Blown Away!!

Because I only started the plan on Monday, I only had four full days of being on program. I was very pleased with how the four days went, though, and knew that no matter what the scales said, I was happy with how it went. My personal scales at home hadn't reflected a loss, so I wasn't expecting much. I was DELIGHTED when the weigh-in showed a loss of 3.2 lb!!! Woo Hoo!!! 

My first major NSV on this journey was the trip to Applebee's for dinner. I had planned ahead by going to the website and choosing my meal ahead of time. The chipoltle chicken dinner is 13 points, andcomes with black bean and corn salsa. That didn't really sound appetizing to me, so I traded it for steamed broccoli, probably shaving off a couple of points. What's even more amazing, I only ate half of it, and brought the other half home for today's lunch. 

At my meeting last night, our leader asked if anyone had downloaded the mobile app for the barcode scanner. Nobody had. This afternoon I had a few minutes to kill, so I downloaded the ap. 

Oh. My. Goodness.

Can I just say... this tool alone is worth every penny I have ever paid, or ever will pay to WW!! It's true! Just point the scanner at the barcode of any food, and it will not only cha-ching and display the points value, it displays all the nutritional info needed to calculate the points. If it doesn't cha-ching, you get a message saying there is no info on that item, and asks if you want to use the calculator to figure the points. Then it lets you 
"name" the item, and it saves it in your history. I spent waaaay more money than I intended to spend, because I was able to scan foods and decide right on the spot if it was an item I'd be willing to spend my points on. 

Also on the mobile WW app itself, there's a tab for restaurants. Zillions of restaurants! With PP values for everything on the menu. And little tabs (ex) 2-4, 5-8, etc. so that if you have 14 points to spend, you click that tab, and it brings up everything on their menu that is 14 points! 

Maybe I'm just crawling out from under the techno rock, but I am uber excited about this!! My previous WW journeys always found me bucking the system by not journaling. "Tracking", I've found is the buzz word nowadays. I work from home, so I'm totally loving the e-tools thing, and tracking is not a chore for me any longer. Especially since I don't have to flip through books and look up points values any more! Yay!! So now I'm even more convinced than ever that... yes... I Believe! This Is My Time!! 

Happy Weekend, everyone!

Tuesday, January 3, 2012

My Year

Rats.  I finally have something to blog about, and I don't have time to really sit down and write a good post.  I'm just here long enough to say that...

This Will Be My Year.

I joined WW (for the umpteenth time).  Since losing my band in July of 2010, I've gained back 30 of the pounds I lost.  Essentially everything I lost with the band.  I had to lose 20 before surgery.  I've kept that 20 off... but those rascals are lurking just out of my sight, waiting to join the 30 that I have gained.

So.  I totally know that I need some help.  I know the WW program works.  I've done it.  I've seen others do it.  And it seems like every time I turn on the TV, or open a magazine, there's Jennifer Hudson calling my name.  She's on the computer ads, too.  So it's kind of like confirmation that I've made the right decision.

My first meeting was last Wednesday.  I knew the program had changed up a little bit, and I wanted a few days to look it over, and get some shopping and planning done.  Plus, I had plans for NYE that included lots of calories.  :-)  

I've looked over the plan, and find it doable, and actually I'm on day two of the program.  So far I've done famously.  I know it will get harder and harder as the days go by... or that seems to be the way for me.  I start out all gung-ho, then lose my momentum and dedication.

But here's my little blog post to declare that This Is The Year that I will do this.


Okay, Jennifer... sing to me some more!